Amanda Fountain - last seen at FK premiere, Status: should now be married to Fraser. Last Known Location: Kent

Adrian Stockdale - last seen at Friday Knight premiere. Status: healthy. Location: Lincolnshire.

Benson, Brian - Location: Living and working in St Albans. Status: Alright thanks. Recent Acquisition: his Mum's Maestro van den plas. Quote: Don't just say it do it.

Anne Saunders - never communicated with MH (poss moved). Status: Unknown. Location: Unknown

Anne-Louise Harvey - Status: Cheery. Location. St. Albans. Most recent correspondence: Earlier this week.

Bruce Maclean - Last seen: performing aerial water acrobatics in Devon. Status: Quo

Chris Evans - working at PR company in London at the moment. Status: a little sad but he'll pull through. Location: Watford

Chris Hanham - Status: Still crazy after all these years, Location: Princes Risborough

Chris Niker - working in West Drayton J4, Technical Sales. Measuring Equipment. Status: Alive & Kicking, Location: Bray. Last Contact: Sept 96.

Dave Wild - still keeping up the British end in Panto. Status: recently remarried. Location: Stone, Staffs. Last contact: Not very good at keeping in touch but will never be very far from the action.

Domenic Cowdell - climbing and adventuring all around the globe. Last seen: Summer 1996. Location: Jolyon sometimes knows where to find him. Status: Mad adventurer.

Michele Warwick - working at London Bridge for Victim Support. Form: got a toyboy, he's scrummy Location: Ilford. Status: merry.

Clare Linger - last know location: Shenfield, Essex. Status: Harv will probably know.

Danny Schwarzberg - he of wobbly knees and zimmer frame fame, Previous form: Christmas Carol. Location: unknown. Status: unknown. Last contacted, March 1996.

Gary Stevenson - recently changed jobs, still working with all things technical. Status: Lost a lot of hair during the making of Friday Knight but OK now. Location. living in Staines with Justin.

George Jarman - Status: crazy, Location: Ashford. Last contacted: March 1996.

Jo Litt - just gone to Australia. (see back page) Status: unknown. Location: Oz.

John Wyatt - just finished Uni, still with Carrie, Status: he's a funny man. Location: Studying a Journalsim course at Harlow. Last contact: Sept 1996.

Jolyon Hennings - still firmly rooted on his astral plane, recent movie star and aristocrat, Hennings, can still be seen around the Hertfordshire countryside. Previous Form: Madhatter of the month: Issue 3. Location: Stevenage, living with Toni, SiBurg and Rich Sully.

Neil Pennock - you can never have enough hats, coats and shoes. Location: St Albans. Work: Uxbridge, Status: fair to middling. Last contact: Sept 96.

Mike Crane - and I quote, "it's a far better thing I do now than I have ever done". Working and studying at Uni of Herts: Location: St Albans, lives with Brian, Neil and Mel Nash. Status: On standby

Jon Moss - still tall after all these years, Last seen: last year. Last Known Location: in Codicote with Julia Gear. Status: unknown.

Justin Flute - working all the hours these days, still in the IT field. Location: Staines, lives with Gary. Status: Almond Slice, happy but busy.

Justine Leahy - Previous form: starring roles in The Boyfriend & Alec in Wonderland, Last contact: Last seen in London in June by Phil Miller (didn't get her number, doh!!).

Kate Hatherley: married to uncle Philly, Philly, Philly, waa, waa and working in Plymouth. Location: Ivybridge, Devon. Status: Almost Gumbified. Last contact: July 96.

Ken Rodrigues - Country & Western singer Location: Watford, Status: Impenetrable. Last contact: Sept 96.

Jayne Ellis - congratulations to Jayne who has now graduated as a fully fledged Teacher. Location: Birmingham. Status: Looking for more permanent position after doing a lot of Supply work.

Kevin Whibley - still photographisinginging, Kevin also recently turned up on TV as the son of a disgraced Bishop. Location: Fleet, Status: Busy, Busy, Chop, Chop, Suey.

Lisa McGrath - Last contact: through Kath, Status: Unknown.

Mary Turton - teenage mutant ninja 'Turts' left Uni a few years back now. Status: sent a few Madhatters but as yet no reply. Current Location: unsure.

Nic McMahon - doing nothing interesting at the moment. Recent Form: Cream in Manchester, club, go-carting, Utopia, Reading, The Orchard, High Wycombe 16 year olds, drugs, sex at 140mph, heinous, no gayness involved, lumping, chilli, vegetables, drunk, bleepy bleepy. HC UR, ambient. (ambulence), (still funny), Playboy, anecdotes -cordial champion. Football lounge VIP, MOM. Europe. Chocolate cigarette, blind date with rotter. Location: High Wycombe

Warren Sweeting - famous UH groupie and celeb. Working selling HRT to middle age women... if you need anything cheap mind. Status: Jovial yet oh so Dry. Last Seen: Starsky & Hutch, London. Sept 1996. Location: Enfield

Simon Hopes - Mild mannered marketing executive by day, international film director by night as he continues to drive the UAC Film Company forward. Status: Trying to increase it. Location: Weybridge.

Phil Miller - Working for Training and Enterprise council and also continuing to forward the UAC Film Company. Still living with Simon Hopes and long time girlfriend, Louise. Last contact: Friday.

Mike Haver - Failed his motorcycle test for the second time, but still drives a Colibra so can't complain too much. Status: Engaged to be married to the lovely Dr Meg in '99.

Sally Bachelor - finished at Herts and working with GCC Marconi Avionics in Rochester. Last contact: July 1996. Status: turbulent but happy.

Mark Belcher- The long arm of the law indeed. Belch is alive and well in Lincs and still living with Hayley. Status: Occasionally allowed to drive a Panda car. Last Contact: Sept 1996. Quote: Your nicked my son.

Simon Harrowing - you will still find him, maybe even wearing a 'new' Leather jacket in Kings Lynn. Status: Could feature shortly with a new Gardening section. Most likely to say: We are the Chipmunks.

Simon Bennett - Proving his worth working to put the Rail network bang to rights. Status: Busy yet content. Location: Canvey. Last Seen: Sept 1996.

Martin Brabham - Previous Madhatter of the month. Martin has the privelige of being the furthest Hatter from Blighty. Form: Greatest moment as a fairy in Alec in Wonderland. Location: South Africa. Last contact: Received letter last year.

Simon Burges - What instrument doesn't he play? Previous Form: Still doing those Sean Connery impressions. 'Down too Early' Burges was last seen goalkeeping for a very well known MH XI. Most likely to say: Aaah, we meet again Blofelt. Location: Stevenage

Suzanne Burgess - living and working in Welwyn. Previous form: Choreographer extraordinaire. Last contact: March 1996.

Cath Hallet - oooo errr missus, Cath was a valuable member of HPDS is her day, but unfortunately disappeared with no forwarding address. Status: unknown. Location: unknown.

Roger Coles - Uncle 'Dodge' recently turned heads at a pro celebrity bash dressed as 'Steed'. Still with Nadine who turns in a fine' Emma Peel', Rog is living in Reading. Last contact: Sept 1996. Status: Serve chilled.

Nathan Dawe - Captain happy go lucky is most certainly still 'in the Zone'. Status: just finished Uni. Location: Living in Enfield with Musical partner Steve French.

Steve Diver - Everyones favourite party man. Location: Hatfield. Status: Drunk. Last seen: Locked in a closet with a party pack of Watneys Red Barrel.

Liz Eckhart - Alive and kicking, dating and a courting with bubbly Si Smith. Liz has recently acquired a job doing DTP and other stuff. Last contact: July 1996.

Junior Lewis - Previous form: Junior played homage to Frank Bruno, before Frank had even paid homage to himself in a startlingly similar role as the Genie in Alec. Last Contact: Down the Font bar, chance in a million meeting in early '95. Location: unknown, unfortunately his address was lost in the bloody wash! Status: unknown

Michaela Durham - tried to contact Mic via Nic T, last we heard she had just had a child, but all reports are as yet unconfirmed. Status: unknown. Present Location: unknown.

Nic Toone - last heard from Nic in Summer 1995 where he'd just finished his second year of a degree in Chemistry at Liverpool. Status: unknown. Location: last heard he was in Liverpool, made many attempts to get him on his mobile phone, obviously hadn't remembered to turn it on. Form: has the possibility to turn up just when least expected.

Stuart Ellerker - mainstay band member, muso, wino and yobbo, Stuart is extending his contract at the SU. Location: Hatfield. Last Contact: Sept 1996.

Julia Gear - last seen in 1995. Location then: Codicote with Jon Moss.

Paul Gidley - in London drinking himself to death, playing footie and softball and currently thinking of buying a monster V8 Landrover. Status: as ever. Last contact: Summer 1996. Most likely to say: "I don't think I'm ever going to be a pop star. Oh and tell Chris Hanham to ring me if you see him, I'm fed up with always making the first move in our long distance relationship"

Shona Gilchrist - Status: still silly. Working: for British library in London. Last contact. July 1996.

Sion Hughes - Status: Funky love groovester. Location: Northants with Josie. Previous form: He's worked in proper motion pictures, guv. Current Status: Difficult to say. Last contact. FK premiere.

Pip Humphrey - alive and well and living with Paul in St Albans. Current Status: Mental as ever. Previous Form: Show us your willy heckling and many other leading roles with UHDS.

Salayha Hussain - sent Salayha a few Madhatters but as yet have not heard anything. Last contact: July 1995. Last known location: Leeds.

Caroline Payne - can still perform a fine Jimmy Saville impression when backed into a corner. Location: St Albans at MHHQ. Working: Telematic, St Albans. Status: Joyous.

Honey Lancaster-James - after giving birth to Jasmine last year Honey is going back to finish her degree. Location: St Albans. Status: Happy.

Toni Matthews - Toni finished Uni this year with a sparkly, spanking new degree. She has just been offered a job in Birmingham but at present is Located in Stevenage with Jolyon. Status: Cool. Last Seen: Sept 1996

Phil Meredith - pops up from time to time in suitably bizarre fashion. Last known Location: Redditch. Last contact: earlier this year.

Sara Mountney - escaped from Leamington Spa earlier this year after less than savoury work type hassle. Last Contact: April 1996. Location: Telford.

Melanie Burns - rumoured to be on a course at Anglia Poly Uni. Location: Still in Royston, Herts. Last seen: July 1996.

Simon Randy - now moving to Portsmouth to further his education. Previous form: Those Magic Changes, Grease. Status: Well. Last contact. August 1996.

Josie Gordon - Location: Deanshanger, Northants with Sion. Last contact: Friday Knight premiere.

Nicola Orchard the first lady of 'Tech'. Nic has now finished Uni and Asda. Last contact: earlier this year. Present location: unknown.

Richard Palmer - was working on the latest all action adventure film for Channel 7.(?). Status: on the net. Location: Norwich.

Robbie Partridge - mother to Hazel, Vicky and the other members of the Partridge family. Last contact: Last year. Location: Hatfield.

Ashley Pearson - the great man of love who inspired us all and will one day inherit the Earth, is busy looking after Jasmine who celebrates her first Birthday shortly. Location: Living at MHHQ in St Albans with Dave, Caro and Andy. Personal heroes: Byron, Shelley, Keats. Status: Gingerly.

Helen Balls - Status: will celebrate her birthday at the Madhatters Banquet. Location: Feltham.

Steve Phipps - now big on the rave scene, living and working up in Manchester, well Sale actually, with Carolyn. Alright the rave thing was a lie. Last contact: keeps a regular oar in with the Hatters posse. Status: Indeed, Very well.

Mark Jones - always has a habit of turning up unexpectedly, this time playing Football for the Crown pub reserves team. Currently working at Anglia Poly Uni. Location: Still living in Hatfield. Last seen: Sept 1996.

Tricia Potter - 'Pots' still very good friends with our Warren, is currently located in London. Status: Happy, by all accounts.

Sam Roach - still a lucky man who's got a smart car or two up his sleeve. Previous form: the man who brought Father Xmas to life. Status: Charismatic. Location: STUDham

Gary Sherin - Last seen: Working part time at the University, Summer 1996. Current location: unknown.

Monica Sinha - Last contact: Madhatters reunion, Dec 1995. Location. Fulham but may have moved as she was at law school.

Rob Slinger - yer, see elsewhere this issue. Location: Tadworth, Surrey. Last contact: Sept 1996. Status: Well, fired up.

Simon Smith - just moved to new house. Location: Northampton. Status: probably quite poor now we should think.

Katrina Thorne - rumoured to have left the Force for Law school. Location: Bournemouth. Last contact: Summer 1996.

Kathryn Whibley - Miss Whibley has recently moved to Birmingham. Last contact: May ball at Uni, 1996.

Jane Young - still nursing, all horror stories to be told at Madhatters banquet. Location: London: Last contact: Aug 1996.

Darren Lalonde - Last known location: St Neots, Cambs. Last contact: Reunion 1995.

Neil Maclaren - heard he was doing Panto in Notts. Last contact: March 1996.

Dave Patrick - self proclaimed Madhatters Editor. Status: Still slightly vague. Location: St Albans. Working in SW London at the Racing Post. Most likely: to sell tips to the highest bidder.

Caroline Green - still heavily into art, still heavily into John. Last seen: Sept 1996. Status: Ecstatic.

Andy Roughton - football crazy Andy is living in St Albans at MHHQ. Previous form: THe irrepresible, Robin Hood. Also Man of the Match last week for the Crown (reserves) Recently moved jobs to work in London. Status: Proper Job.

Miles Maxwell - gave him a call before last issue, seemed jolly enough. Location: Warks. Current Status: unknown.